Three-Quarters
by WhatsTheGistPhysicist
Summary: After a crazy night of drinking in apartment 4A, Penny wakes up to find that her life is about to take a turn for the unimaginable. She receives high levels of disdain from all of her former best friends after her promiscuity becomes far too much for them.


Penny woke up with the raging headache that came whenever she was hungover. She took a few seconds before opening her eyes to try and remember where she was. She definitely was not in her apartment; the blankets were too scratchy, and the bed seemed to have no springs in it at all.

In horror she quickly recognized the scent of Leonard's apartment, and had a few minor flashbacks concerning her actions the night before. She had definitely been in her neighbours' apartment and had shot back far too many drinks.

"Fuck," she thought, cursing herself because she knew exactly what her lack of judgement in a drunken state usually led to. Still not opening her eyes, as if she wanted to waste a few seconds before confirming her suspicions, she moved her right hand across the bed, and came into contact with a body next to hers, equally as unclothed.

"DAMMIT," Penny thought. Leonard had a girlfriend. And however bad all of Penny's life decisions had been up to this point, she'd never been one to have a man cheat on his girlfriend with. At least, not intentionally.

"Leonard?" Penny whispered quietly. The figure next to her stirred, but did not respond. A sudden thought struck Penny. Since she only had vague memories of the previous night, Leonard, being a less experienced drinker, might have even less. She could sneak out quietly before he even noticed she'd ever been there, and act like he had been dreaming the whole thing if he had any recollections.

She got up and faced away from the figure next to her, as if by not looking at him, she might eventually convince herself that this had all been a dream.

_Leonard redid his room_, Penny noted. It was much cleaner than she'd ever seen it, and the bed had been pushed against the east wall rather than the south. _All Priya's doing, most likely. _

Penny gazed at the alarm clock. It was 7.55 in the am, and based on past experiences, both Leonard and Sheldon would be up and ready to go to work in less than half an hour. If she wanted to escape without being noticed, she had to get moving.

_Where are my clothes? _Penny thought, scouring the floor.

Leonard stirred again, and Penny was beginning to panic. She considered making a break for it; no one else was awake in the apartment, and she doubted that she'd encounter anyone if she dashed from apartment 4A to 4B. However, she wasn't sure if Wolowitz had ever taken that camera down in the hallway, and she wasn't willing to run around the apartment in the nude for Howard and Raj's enjoyment.

_Where are my fucking clothes? _

Penny got to her knees and looking under the bed. There was nothing other than some of Leonard's shoes. She noticed that they were all size twelve's. Hmm... That was new... Or had she just not noticed how big Leonard's feet were before?

No. She almost distinctly remembered them being size seven's.

_Now's not the time to think about this_," she told herself angrily. She spotted her bra near Leonard's nightstand, crawled across the floor and snatched it up. Staying low to the ground, she managed to put it on without wasting too much time. Then Leonard sneezed, and Penny froze.

Thankfully, the lump on the bed remained motionless, but it was a sure sign that Leonard would be awake very soon. Penny decided that at least Howard and Raj would not see her breasts if they still had cameras up anywhere in the building.

_But Leonard will find my panties," _Penny thought in horror. _Or Priya will, and she'll know that they're not her own. _

"FUCK. MY. LIFE," she said softly.

Penny got up to her knees, and suddenly her eyes were attracted to a pink splash of colour on Leonard's Darth Vader sheets. She reached across Leonard's body, carefully making sure that she did not wake him, and snatched up her panties.

She slipped them on and began tip-toeing towards the door. She'd already become aware that her other clothes were definitely not in this room. She put her hand on the doorknob and was about to turn it when the sound of yawning from behind her reached her ears. As if it were all happening in slow-motion, she suddenly felt nauseas, and the yawn stopped halfway. She heard it in her mind before she heard it out loud.

"PENNY?!"

Penny froze in horror. A horrific thought that had not crossed her mind before floated towards her brain. No... It couldn't be... it was impossible...

Penny turned around slowly, her sudden wave of nausea multiplying by the second. She gasped quite loudly.

For she was now face to face with a bewildered, nude Sheldon Cooper.


End file.
